Day 65: Uncle Paul's Life Lessons From The Road

Update: 223.6 lbs, 34.6 lbs so far, 3.4 left to reach goal.

The other day Nick told me about a 13 mile loop that takes off from my neighborhood, circles around the boonies, and then back, for a good bike ride. For those who know the area it takes off down Shoreline, which crosses to Windsor Island Rd, out to Ravena, cut back down Wheatland to River Rd, to Lockhaven, back to Windsor Island, Shoreline, and then back into the neighborhood. As is usually the case, a new venture like this for me is full of little lessons...lessons which today, Uncle Paul would like to share with you.

You CAN Teach An Old Dog New Tricks
Remember the pitbulls from last week's ride..yeah, well I avoid them now by taking a different route. Today from a distance I spotted an old, chubby German shepherd guarding a farm, that I would have to ride by. I picked up just a little speed to be sure, and as I got closer, he started barking and started moving towards me. I could tell he wasn't going to catch me as long as I didn't slow down, but I decided to act like I needed to speed up anyway...to give him a little thrill chase. I'm sure as an old, chubby dog, he was going to go back and tell his other dog buddies how he nearly mauled this big brown guy on a bike -- "you should have seen it, like a ginormous double scoop chocolate cone on two wheels!"

Well just about the time I was patting myself on the back for boosting this old dog's ego, I picked something up out of my peripheral vision -- a younger, slightly less chubby german shepherd that was coming from another part of the same property, making a bee line to cut me off at the pass! Santa Maria! This time, I actually had to kick up the horses a bit so he wouldn't take out my front forks. Close call, but I staved off the sneak attack. Later on, I was pretty sure the Pitbulls from across K-town called the G-Sheps and told them they'd need a blind sweeping attack to fake me out. I don't know who let the dogs out, but call the score: Attack Dogs - 0, Mex-On-The-Bike - 2.

Don't Spit Into the Wind
Ok, this one I actually learned from Jim Croce back when I was a wee lad, (or Wii lad these days.) However, I'd forgotten what a pain it is to ride in the wind. Today I realized that a good tailwind can make you feel like you're Lance Armstrong, whereas a strong headwind actually reduces you to Lance Bass...(yeah, I'm not really sure what that means either, but I needed a good Lance-Lance drop there.) With no wind, I actually had some pretty good cruising speeds, but once I hit some of the open fields of the backwoods the winds slowed me down to nearly half speed, which stinks. I'm not sure how this works, since I made one big loop, but I managed to have a headwind for about 2/3rds of my ride...which is nice. Check the wind before you ride. If Something Wicked This Way Comes, maybe hold off for a break in the weather.

Easy Does It
On the gearshifting that is. As I hit one particular hilly area, I decided to shift down to make life a little easier, but actually went the wrong way and geared up making the pedaling twice as hard. I panicked, and shifted right away two gears the other direction. This was on the front sprocket shifter, so it's actually jumping by 10's, if that makes sense. Anyway, since I didn't allow for the chain to fully engage before shifting the other way, and since I was standing on that crank at the time, I derailed it. Thank goodness I still had a runny nose from my cold, because I had put tissues in every pocket of my shorts (all 4 of them) in case I needed them. Turns out I did, but to wipe the grease off my hands. Now I realize carrying a few tissues, or some sort of rag is a good idea. Also didn't realize there was a U-Pick Tulip patch (farm, garden, villa..???) on Wheatland, but I do now, and a mom and daughter got a great shot of me from behind bending over to fix my chain...sorry ladies.

No Means No!
At about mile 7.3 of this loop is a road that runs uphill named Ravena. It's named for the late famous hispanic cyclist Edwardo Ravena who died instantly when he attempted to actually ride up this almost completely vertical stretch of road. He made it about halfway, and simply gave out from exhaustion. The local townfolk decided to memorialize his effort by calling that Ravena's Hill, or simply 'Ravena' nowadays. Anyway, my eyes were bigger than my stamina today.

I saw the hill from a good half mile to mile away, and started mentally preparing for it. "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can." But my legs were saying, "yeah, aint gonna happen my friend." Having been recently inspired by an episode of Friday Night Lights I began to encourage the legs that 'they really could, if they'd just dig down deep.' As I neared the throat of the hill, I downshifted (no derailement this time) and proceeded to dig on in. Everything was going great until about a third of the way up, when something strange happened...my bike simply stopped. No slowing down, or rolling to a stop, it just up and stopped. Really, the wierdest thing I've had happen on a bike in my life. There was no more energy in my legs, and we were at such an incline that gravity pulled us to a motionless state. I quickly hopped off and pushed it the rest of the way up the hill.

I later noticed something odd...I have a shifter on the right side of my bike too, and if I move that little dial thingy, I can actually change the gears on the back sprocket, which makes life much easier. I had tried going up that hill in about gear 8, instead of something like 3, or more realistically, 1. Anyway, I know better for next time. And since I remembered that whole 'other gear thing' on Wheatland, it made the hill by McNary Golf course easier to get up and over as well. Use them shifters, they're there for a reason.

Well, there you go...dont' say Uncle Paul never gave you nothin'!

Hasta.

PS - you know what stinks? Riding to work and back, playing golf, and playing basketball on Friday, riding for an hour on Saturday, and staying under 1500 calories for 3 days in a row (eve over a holiday) and going up .4 of a pound, not losing.

Day 63: End of the Week Round Up

Update: 223.2 lbs, 35.0 lbs so far, 3.0 left to reach goal.

I think readership is lower on the weekends, but for those of you who check in for your daily bit of chubby love, here are some random things from the week.

Yesterday was crazy. Rode into work, then off to the golf course for a round, then raced back into town and grabbed stuff to set up for game night with the mid high kids last night, then somehow got conned into playing basketball for about 40 minutes -- something I haven't done in ages. Today the old chesteral muscles are feeling a tad sore, and not sure if it's from first golf of the season swinging, or shooting the ball. Needless to say, yesterday was like triathalon calorie burning.

Also, discovered the wonders of White Tea this week. Mark from the office brought some in and I'm officially hooked. We kept trying to figure out what it smelled like when it was brewed (kind of scary since we had some serious sea water smell from some of his previous green tea) and the word citrus was thrown out once or twice. However, while sipping on some freshly brewed tea while watching Mark give his best effort at ripping it up "You Really Got Me" on Guitar Hero, I realized what it was - Starbursts. The white tea we have smells like Starbursts...how can you not love that tea.

And to follow up on the gut question from yesterday...yes, the swing is a little different. I overpowered almost every single short iron shot when approaching the green yesterday, and long shots are a bit wacky, but overall it felt much better playing with 35 of my little fat buddies as only distant memories. My back was a little sore at the end of the round, but that's because I've recently realized I'm quite a sloucher, and I no longer have as much of my gut to kind of prop me up from slouching too much, if that makes sense. So now when I slouch, I really slouch, and it's kind of messing with my back. Trying to work on posture now.

That's it...we're off to a rainy egg hunt for the little fella today.

Hasta!

Day 62: Does the Gut Interfere With the Swing?

Update: 224.0 lbs, 34.2 lbs so far, 3.8 left to reach goal.

I think I'm getting out onto the course today, 34 lbs lighter than the last time I picked up a club. I'm just curious if the gut, or the reduction of the gutteral area, will affect my swing, either for the better or for the worse?

I read an article in Golf Digest on John Daly, a golfer who shares similar body shape to me. He said losing weight did nothing for his game but hurt his swing:

GD - The PGA Tour media guide has you weighing 220.

JD - Uh, that's a little low. I'm about 245 right now, and I'm not fighting it anymore. I wouldn't mind being about 230 or 235, but I found when I did lose weight, like when Loy put me on that starvation diet, my swing changed with my body. I've tried to lose weight two or three times, and every time, my golf game was horrible. My swing got quicker. I know that sounds like an excuse not to lose weight, but that doctor in Pittsburgh said nothing's beating fast inside me. So I'm happy and Sherrie's happy. She says she likes fat men.

Hmmm, well I don't claim to be anywhere near the golfer that Daly is, but if losing weight means my meager game will become all the more meager, then I guess I can be a happier, skinnier, mini-golf fan. Who else loves fat men? Lets here it for us stout fellas!

Anyway, looking forward to a little extra exercise too. I'll let you know how it goes.

Hasta.

Day 61: The Commute

Update: 224.0 lbs, 34.2 lbs so far, 3.8 left to reach goal.

Yesterday, this little beauty was my mode of transportation for getting to work. I've been wanting to ride in since getting my new bike a few weeks ago, but either the weather has been bad, I've had tons of stuff to take with me, or meetings all over town, or something that has kept me from commuting on two wheels.

Yesterday I still was feeling sick, but figured it was going to be a decent day, so I just bit the bullet and did it. All in all, I rode down to the office, then out to Riverfront park before heading to meet an old friend at Starbucks, and then back home at the end of the day. Not really a long ride -- logging less than 10 miles total for the day. Yesterday, I was one of those geeky guys on a bike, helmet and all.

Riding my bike has really become preferred method of exercise. If it's nice out (or even a little not-so-nice) and I've got some time, I would much rather go for a ride than get on the treadmill. I'm still a little concerned about the image from behind the bike for those that are following me, but hopefully before long I can reduce the 'golf ball on a tee' look that I currently represent. I'm not sure how many days I'll get to ride down to the office (you can't carry your clubs on a bike very easy, you know) but I'm going to shoot for at least 2-3, especially as the weather gets nice.

Pool update....sorry Syd, I tried, I really tried.....

K-biz - 4/1 - Date Passed.
Mistee - 4/4 - Date Passed.
Syd - 4/5 - Date Passed.
Jen - 4/8
Michael - 4/10
SeagravesJ - 4/25
Joe - 4/27
Skovelli (late entry) - 5/1

Hasta, y'all.

Day 60: Can't Believe It's Been 60 Days

Update: 224.8 lbs, 33.4 lbs so far, 4.6 left to reach goal.

Well, today is 60 days on the ol' Calorie Cutback plan...and I figured it was time for a little math. For the past 60 days I've had no more than 1500 calories every day since starting. Now, those are net calories, so some days I did eat a little more than 1500 calories, but I burned enough in my exercise for the day to bring the net number back under 1500.

So, for the past 60 days I've consumed no more than 90,000 net calories total. Now if you remember from a previous post, I was surprised to find out that most days I probably was pushing 3000 calories, and some days probably getting up near that 4000 calorie mark. Sad to put down in ink, but true---that's how you get to be 258 lbs. If you're doing the math, that means for the past 60 days, in my old habits, I would have most likely put away between 180,000-240,000 calories. The difference would be between 90,000 and 150,000 calories.

To give you a visual, that means I've eaten the equivelant of 150 Big Macs over the past 60 days (sounds like a 30 Days episode,) or 2.5 Big Macs per day. (I thought about using the initials BM here so I didn't have to keep typing the full name, but that could be misaken for some other McDonalds induced and/or related function that we don't really want to talk about.) However, on my old eating plan, I would have eaten between 300-400 Big Macs during that same time, or 5-6.7 Big Macs per day. Hmmm....tasty.

Ok, more math: basically, every 3500 calories equals one pound of fat. If you consume, over any amount of time, 3500 more calories than your burn or expel, you will store a pound of fat. If, over any amount of time, you consume 3500 calories less than you burn or expel, you will lose that stored pound of fat. I'm kind of over-simplifying because there are obviously lots of other things that will effect fat storage or loss like water consumption, muscle building, sickness, time of month, cycles of the moon, etc, but you can see the basic math. I've lost 33 lbs in the past 60 days, and that lines up with the math. Using my Trussell-esque mathmatical abilities, I would have had to have consumed 115,500 less calories than I burned or expelled to lose those 33 lbs and lookie here, 33 x 3500 = 115,500, which falls into that 90,000-150,000 range I mentioned above. And all this time I thought I'd never use that math again!

So what do the next 30 days hold for me? Well hopefully I hit that 38 lb first goal, and then move on to my 50 lb goal by day 90. From there, maybe I'll shoot for some early-days-of-marriage weight, but we'll see how it goes.

Thanks again for all the encouragement, tips, prayers, cards, thoughts, karma, backrubs, and cash gifts....really, they all do help. :)

Hasta!

P.S. - Since another date has passed, time for a pool update:

K-biz - 4/1 - Date Passed.
Mistee - 4/4 - Date Passed.
Syd - 4/5
Jen - 4/8
Michael - 4/10
SeagravesJ - 4/25
Joe - 4/27
Skovelli (late entry) - 5/1

Day 59: The Security Blanket

Update: 225.8 lbs, 32.4 lbs so far, 5.6 left to reach goal.

I always loved Peanuts growing up, no comic ever came close to them for me, until Calvin and Hobbes, which I miss all the time. Snoopy of course was my favorite character, but I think as I grow older, I realize I'm probably most like Linus, enjoying the security and comfort of the common every day patterns in my life.

2 days after getting back from camping, I realize it feels good to be back in the groove of the calorie cutback from the comfort of home. Even with a couple meals out (one of them to Claim Jumper...oh momma), knowing that I can come home and adjust my meals accordingly is like a safety net that catches me from diving off the edge.

I'm not planning on eating this strictly afer hitting all my goals, but until then, I do like reaching each daily goal along the way. For a man of little self control, having a number to reach every day helps keep me on course for the long haul. I was encouraged yesterday with another email from Kyle - the fellow who's article started this whole process - and the fact that he's kept off the 50 lbs for over a year now, with just moderate effort. One of my greatest fears is to have made a serious effort for the first time, and then be one of the many who gain it all back...I don't want to do that. Hopefully the exercise I've incorporated, and the database of food I will have built will help to keep a healthier overall lifestyle in place. Of course, the new plan will also make room for Paddingtons Humdingers...gotta have that.

Hasta

Day 58: Under The Weather

Update: 226.4 lbs, 31.8 lbs so far, 6.2 left to reach goal.

Another little bit of trivia for you...the term under the weather is apparently an old sailor phrase. From IdiomSite.com:

"I believe that "under the weather" is an old sailor phrase. When men were sick, they would rest below deck and thus were literally "under" the weather on deck. Moreover, the deck they were under was likely "the weather deck", meaning the most exposed deck on the ship, usually the foredeck, or the quarterdeck. Either way, if you needed to be sick, you wouldn't want to "toss your cookies" where the wind could toss them back in your face, nor would anyone with you want you to do so. You'd be firmly told to go "under the weather" to be sick."

Well, at any rate, I started feeling not-so-hot on our camping trip, and really kind of hit a low point yesterday. (Probably what made me grumpy with the craptacular service we had at our favorite Chinese eatery yesterday.....who thinks 'steamed rice' sounds like 'fried rice' and if we're not going to get utensils, at least give us the chopsticks!) Still not feeling hot today - not enough to keep you home in bed, just not great.

It's amazing how certain food associations sneak back up on me. This head cold thing I've got (or whatever it is...at least it's not some kind of flu bug) also hit my two boys and wife, and kept our littlest guy up until 2:30 this morning. I had an overwhelming urge to whip up a plate of something, anything, from about midnight till 2 am...a normal snacking time in days gone by of late night kid episodes. I was a little hungry, but I think it was the association of the comfort side of food that was even more overwhelming. Without really thinking about it, I nearly hopped off the wagon simply because I wasn't feeling so hot. And boy, 6 am comes quick after a night like that!

I also didn't feel like exercising yesterday (not that there's a ton of time on Sunday's anyway) and overall motivation to 'stay the course' was generally low. Be interesting to see how being 'under the weather' will affect the calorie cutback progress.

On another note, here are the updated pool standings:
K-biz - 4/1 - Date Passed.
Mistee - 4/4
Syd - 4/5
Jen - 4/8
Michael - 4/10
SeagravesJ - 4/25
Joe - 4/27

Looking like the second half of the list has the best shot right now. Too bad this wasn't a flu bug, I'd probably hit the goal by Wednesday!

Hasta.

Day 57: We're Back - Crazy Sunday

Update: 226.6 lbs, 31.6 lbs so far, 6.4 left to reach goal.

It's crazy Sunday again, so just a couple of quick notes this morning. First, you *can* go camping, have a great time, and still eat decent, and hit your caloric goals everyday. I took my scale with me, to continue on with my log, but won't go back and post for everyday...but as you can see from the update, still moving forward. I wanted to hit 38 lbs by today, but I've been in the slowdown, so we're still a few days out, at least.

Kah-nee-ta is great. You can check out the website there in the link - I hadn't been for close to 20 years, and they've kept the place up, and even upgraded a few things, like adding in a ginormous slide for their pool. For those that don't know, Kah-nee-ta is a reservation built on hot springs, so the pool is heated naturally, and stays around 90 degrees all year long. We rode bikes, went on walks, went to the pool, watched Survivor (Dish), played games, laughed, hung out and just enjoyed a few days off in the new trailer.

Gotta get out the door to church, so that's about it for now...back to normal posting tomorrow.

Hasta.